009. My Inconvenient Truth

c1c84a993204f9997cc9d95c6d0fa1e1--alcohol-recovery-quotes-drug-recovery-quotesAs I had stated in entry 010., there was a post in my draft box waiting to be published. I read through it today (with intent of publishing it), and realized that I wanted to take it in a new direction.

The post was basically about my struggles with weight loss. Now instead of glamorizing the struggles, I want to give it a more raw approach. I want to vent and I want to be angry. I want to express how I feel without having to apologize for it. So here it is.

Weight loss journeys SUCK.

I’m not sure what more to say then that. Weight loss journeys are such roller coasters; one minute you are motivated enough to fun a marathon, the next you’re being a “Debbie Downer” because you remember why you are on this journey in the first place.

That is something I wish people would have told me each time I have tried to shed some lbs. You don’t really expect that something that is suppose to improve the quality of your life to be so emotionally exhausting.

I guess for me, the worst is knowing that I am battling myself. I have recently been diagnosed with BED (Binge-Eating Disorder). Although frightening to have been told this, it really has given me some clarity as to why I behave certain ways.

For anyone who may ask, I am seeking professional help with this issue. I have begun therapy and have absolutely NO intentions on quitting.

I would also like to draw attention to an excellent resource that has given me piece of mind in knowing the in’s & out’s of BED and other eating disorders; NEDIC.

National Eating Disorder Information Center‘s website is an amazing information hub packed full of articles and resources to help you get educated on many different types of Eating Disorders.

If you or someone you know suffers from an eating disorder, please reach out and get the professional help you need. There is no shame in recovery.

&as always, if you have made it this far, know that I like you, I appreciate you.

-D

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009. My Inconvenient Truth

011. It’s Dani’s NEW Life.

Today, I bring to you some VERY exciting news.

Today, is the 1st day of the rest of my life.

Today, I start my journey into health (& fitness!).

Last night I was looking for inspiration. I was searching through all social media platforms I had an account with. I finally came across the YouTube channel “FatGirlFedUp” aka Lexi.

Lexi is a 26 year old Indiana woman who amazingly lost 300 lbs since January 1st 2016. AMAZING! Not only did she get control of her life, but she did so along side her husband Danny (who lost 86 lbs !) and they both did this with diet and exercise ONLY!

Let me give you a little disclaimer; in NO WAY am I discrediting anyone who has had to opt for weight loss surgeries or any other means of weight loss that is not the “traditional” diet/exercise combo. The reason I say that I am so inspired by Lexi & Danny is that I am far too scared to try more invasive methods to shed the lbs I need to lose.

Now that that is out of the way, I’d like to explain my plan, goals.

I am a firm believer that setting small, attainable goals is the best course of action, for me anyway. I would much rather meet 15 small goals then to never reach 5 bigger ones. So to start, I want to first be going to the gym at least 3 – 5 times (3 being the minimum) per week. To go with this goal, I want to make a side goal of being able to reach 10 minutes on the elliptical. I have very weak and problematic knee’s and I need to start working them!

I’m going to give myself 2 weeks to make it to 10 minutes. After 2 weeks, I will post to update and keep track of my progress.

Aside from blogging, I will be documenting my journey on Instagram @itsdanislifee . I can’t wait to look back months & years from now to see how far I will have come.

If you have any pointers or advice for a health/fitness newbie, please let me know!!

Cheers to a new journey *

 

-Dani

011. It’s Dani’s NEW Life.

005. where’d you get that body from?

It finally happened. Yesterday, I shocked the entire world with one small appointment. Yesterday, I, Dani Saulnier, joined the gym.

THE GYM.

Leading up to this, I have been bombarded by invitations to join. A few of my coworkers had joined, as well as friends of mine, and they kept talking about how fun it would be for us all to go together. As fun as it sounded, and as much as I needed an intervention about my health habits, I always seemed to push away the idea.

It’s not something I talk about much, mostly because I don’t feel that I have it as bad as some people. I do suffer from anxiety. Some days are worse then others, but for the most part I am able to live a normal life (whatever that means). I do feel that anxiety does hold me back from doing things I would like to be doing; ie. going to the gym.

My thought process whenever I tried thinking about going to the gym was the following :
– “Everyone’s going to stare at me.”
-“Everyone laughs at the fat girl trying to work out.”
-“I’m going to look stupid not knowing what to do on machines.”
-“There’s no way I can keep up in classes.”
Theses thoughts are not healthy. These thoughts are clouding my judgement. Even though every single person I have spoken to about this has reassured me that those thoughts are just not the case, I still believed that it would be a traumatic experience. Until I actually went.

Fast forward to last night, I finished work and decided “Okay, today’s the day. I’m going to get my membership.” So I headed on over and met with the two nicest people I have ever met. Not only were they very comforting, but they actually took into consideration that I was SO nervous and had previous feelings of anxiety associated with the gym as a whole. They gave me pointers and options on how I can get the most out of my gym experience while keeping the anxiety to a minimal. They made me feel as though I belonged and seemed to genuinely care about every word I spoke. They applauded me for the small milestones I achieved recently and are helping me get to where I am going.

Tomorrow morning I meet with a personal trainer. He will be showing me the ropes, giving me some insight on how to better my lifestyle and teach me how to get back into shape. The person I am seeing is even recognized for his knowledge in weight management and life coaching.

I can’t wait to see where this journey takes me. My only goal is to get healthy. That obviously means I am going to shed some pounds, but I don’t want to overwhelm myself with numbers. So here’s to the first day of the rest of my life!!!

& if you have managed to read this far, I like you and I appreciate you.

-Dani

005. where’d you get that body from?